Coping Strategies for EMDR Therapy: Managing Emotions Between Sessions

EMDR therapy can stir up strong emotions or memories that may linger after a session. This handout provides practical tools to help you feel more in control and grounded until your next appointment. These strategies are designed to calm your mind and body, helping you manage any distress. Try them out, see what works best for you, and share your experience with your therapist.

Important: If you feel overwhelmed or unsafe, contact your therapist or a crisis line immediately (e.g., 988 in the U.S.). You don’t have to go through this alone.

1. TIPP Skills: Quick Ways to Calm Your Body

These techniques shift your body’s stress response to help you feel calmer fast.

• Temperature: Splash cold water on your face, hold a wrapped ice pack on your wrists or neck for 30 seconds, or sip cold water. This can slow your heart rate and ease intense emotions. Try This: Keep a small ice pack in your fridge or a cold water bottle nearby for quick use.

• Intense Exercise: Do 1-2 minutes of fast movement, like jumping jacks, running in place, or dancing to a favorite song. This burns off stress energy. Try This: Pick a short, fun activity you can do anywhere, like a quick dance break.

• Paced Breathing: Breathe in for 4 seconds, hold for 4, and exhale for 6. This helps your body relax. Try This: Use a timer or phone app to guide you for 2-3 minutes.

• Muscle Relaxation: Tense a muscle group (like your fists or shoulders) for 5 seconds, then release, noticing the difference. Move to another muscle group. Try This: Start with your hands and work up to your shoulders for a full-body release.

2. Butterfly Hug: Gentle Self-Soothing

This technique uses slow, alternating taps to calm your mind, similar to what we do in EMDR.

• How to Do It: Cross your arms over your chest, hands on your upper arms. Tap left, then right, slowly (1 tap per second) for 1-2 minutes. Focus on a calming image, like your safe place from therapy, or a peaceful memory. Try This: Picture a favorite place (like a beach or cozy room) while tapping to feel grounded.

3. Radical Acceptance: Let Go of Fighting Feelings

Accepting your emotions without judgment can reduce their intensity.

• How to Do It: Notice how you’re feeling (e.g., “I’m anxious, and that’s okay”). Say or write, “This feeling is part of my healing, and it will pass.” Then, do a small action, like sipping water or petting a pet. Try This: Keep a note on your phone or a card with a phrase like, “I can handle this moment.” Read it when you feel stuck.

  
  

4. Opposite Action: Shift Your Mood

Act opposite to what your emotions are urging you to do to change how you feel.

• How to Do It: If you want to isolate, try texting a friend or stepping outside for a short walk. If you feel angry, try a gentle activity, like listening to soft music or stretching. Try This: Make a short list of 2-3 actions (e.g., call a friend, watch a funny clip) to turn to when emotions feel heavy.

5. Sensory Container: Store Distress for Later

This helps you “set aside” overwhelming thoughts or feelings until your next session.

• How to Do It: Imagine a container (like a box or jar) that can hold your distress. Picture placing the tough emotions or memories inside, closing it, and setting it aside. Press your palms together or clasp your hands to seal the image. Try This: Picture your container’s color or material (e.g., a blue safe with a lock) to make it feel real.

6. Challenge Negative Thoughts

Shift unhelpful beliefs that may linger after EMDR.

• How to Do It: Write down a negative thought (e.g., “I’m not safe”). Counter it with a positive or neutral one from therapy (e.g., “I’m learning to feel safe”). Repeat the positive thought while tapping your feet alternately. Try This: Keep a small notebook or phone note to jot down thoughts and their counters daily.

  
  

7. Sensory Substitution: Focus on Your Senses

Shift your attention to a calming sensory experience to ease distress.

• How to Do It: Hold a textured object (like a smooth stone or stress ball) and focus on its feel. Or listen to a favorite song, nature sounds, or sip a strong-flavored drink (like peppermint tea). Try This: Create a “sensory kit” with items like a scented lotion, a small toy, or earbuds with a calming playlist.

8. PLEASE: Take Care of Your Body

Taking care of your physical needs can make emotions easier to manage.

• How to Do It:

  • PL: Treat any physical illness (e.g., take prescribed medication).

  • E: Eat a balanced snack or meal to stabilize energy.

  • A: Avoid alcohol, caffeine, or other mood-altering substances.

  • S: Aim for consistent sleep (try a bedtime routine).

  • E: Do a short activity, like a 10-minute walk. Try This: Pick one of these to focus on each day, like drinking enough water or taking a brief walk.

Tips for Success

• Try Them Out: Test 1-2 strategies when you’re calm to get comfortable with them. This makes them easier to use when you’re upset.

• Personalize: Choose the tools that feel right for you. Everyone’s different!

• Track What Works: Jot down which strategies help most and share with your therapist to build your toolkit.

• Stay Connected: If you’re struggling, reach out to your therapist or a trusted person. You’re not alone in this process.